MARRIED BUT UNLOVED

Genesis 29:30-31 Jacob lay with Rachel also, and HE LOVED RACHEL MORE THAN LEAH. And he worked for Laban another seven years. When the Lord saw the Leah was NOT LOVED, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren.

LEAH in Hebrew means WEARY, TIRED, TENDER or WEAK.

A simple question for the single person. At what state are you approaching the idea of marriage?
For the married person. At what state did you enter into your marriage? Let’s put some substance into the above questions from the example of Leah’s love story in Genesis 29

Here is Leah, daughter of Laban. Leah had WEAK EYES and most probably unattractive, unlike her younger sister, Rachel who was lovely in form and beautiful. According to their custom, the younger sister could not get married before her elder sister. So here we see a problem. Even through the bible does not mention it, it is most probable that Rachel had many suitors. But NO, none of them were interested in her sister Leah. Hence, right from the start, Leah was always DISADVANTAGED. Not only because she was physically unattractive, but she was seen as an obstacle by men who wanted her sister instead. In every sense of that word, Leah known the constant pain of rejection and yes, SHE WAS WEARY!

Then one day, their first cousin, Jacob arrived unannounced. And yes, with time, he fell in love with his attractive younger cousin, Rachel and wanted her for a wife. Hence, the bible says, that Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of HIS LOVE FOR HER. But unknown to him, on his wedding night, Leah was the one at his side and not Rachel, his beloved. In fact the bible states it this way; WHEN MORNING CAME, THERE WAS LEAH! Reading those words, I see the the disgust in Jacob’s eyes and Leah again understands: Marriage hasn’t changed a thing about who she was. If anything, she was now BOUND BUT UNLOVED. But sad to say, Leah’s love story is repeated over and over in our everyday reality.

You see, Leah was unhappy and unfulfilled as a single people. She never tried to find her self-worth beyond her physical beauty or rather lack of it. She was constantly comparing herself against her attractive younger sister Rachel. Then again, as a married woman, she found herself having to fight for the love of her husband, who she shared with lovely sister, Rachel. What more, the birth and naming of her first three sons were an attempt at drawing attention if not a little love from her husband but with no results. Then something changed when she borne her fourth son. She said, ‘THIS TIME I WILL PRAISE THE LORD.’ So she called him Judah. THEN SHE STOPPED HAVING CHILDREN.

Maybe that is you out there. You are trying to find love at any cost. Even though your heart is bruised and hurting, you think things will get better this time round. Maybe you are already married. Yes, you were not whole when you walked down the aisle. You thought that somehow, the new love could cover-up for the painful past. Before long, you realize that it only helps to magnify the unresolved issues in your past. But thanks be to God…Leah found comfort and healing…no, not in her own way, but God’s. She found joy and love and peace in her Maker, the one who known her better than her, herself. And her quest for love came to an end…she stopped having children!

God wants meet your need for love today, be it as a single person or married!

Advertisements

11 thoughts on “MARRIED BUT UNLOVED

  1. hey glad,
    will be happy to read your ms. but can we do chapter one first before deciding if I am to read through the whole? I am not critic, and simply a simple person, but thanks for honoring me to read it. also, it will be helpful to have some questions in mind before I read through it. … questions you have and want the readers to see and wonder if readers have them. so do think a little bit if you have any questions. that will guide my reading and my critique (better say, sharing). btw, send it to lelapinamoureux@gmail. com and do give me grace for allowing me some time to get back to you. currently quite a bit to handle, but thankful for a change to get to know you a bit more through your writing.
    love,
    dora

    • Hi Dora. Thank you. I will definitely send you the first chapter in a couple of days with some questions too. Do bear with you on this one. And I do appreciate your time!!!

      Blessings as always,

      Gladwell

  2. That was a really refreshing thought…had never thought of it like that before….Our search for love ends when we finally reach at the cross….Nothing in this world can replace that love…Thank you for sharing…

    God Bless,
    Rani John

  3. Love has always been an uphill struggle for me. So to overcome this handicap, I’ve spent all of my Christian life (25 years) asking the Lord to help me love my wife, my kids, my enemies and everyone. Thank God, He answers prayers or I’d be a rejected lump on the side of the road.

  4. Thanks friend. Surprisingly I’m not sleepy. Just gonna push on. smiles…today anyways. After church tomorrow…we’ll see…On my way to visit my great aunt Mittie who is in a Nursing Home. Even though she is diagnosed at 90 with Alzheimers and Dementia…she plays a mean game of rummy and she’s looking for us to come so she can beat us! lol…off and running. I’ll be back…likely today! Love E

  5. Hello Gladwell! I read this wonderful article around 8 this morning on my cell phone from the bed. God is so merciful! It is so Blessed! I had been up til 5 workin…ya know…this we do …we are so Blessed to do.

    I do truly love the story of Rachel and Leah…Thank you for giving us such a fresh perspective. I was Blessed and will pass on to my email network. Have a great weekend! Love E

    • Hi Elaine. You need some sleep after a whole day up! Go on…have yourself a great and blessed weekend. Hope to hear from you, God will at the start of the week!

      Love, Gladwell

  6. At my one of my wedding showers I received the best advice- marriage isn’t to make you happy it is to make you holy. Even though you go to bed with someone by your side does not mean you are happy or fulfilled. The only true happiness comes when you find your self worth in God. Which usually comes with many uncomfortable feelings, sacrifice and changing your own actions. If you view love within the context of what you will get you will come to naught. If you view love in the context of what you can do for others you will receive so much more than expected.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s